12:40 pm Monday, 5th August, 2013
‘Grief’: Wikipedia defines it as ‘a multi-faceted response to loss, particularly to the loss of someone or something to which a bond was formed’. Nope, were not talking death loss here, we’re talking about splitting up with your partner loss. This may sound like no big deal to those of you who have a built in, ‘get the hell over it quick’ mechanism, but for the rest of us pussies out there, we are thrown into the world of singledom and power through the first few weeks of it using a mixture of messy nights out and unequivocal affirmations from our friends: ‘Listen, they were such a looser. You can do so much better’: and then what? A few weeks later your liver is questioning it’s relationship with you and you have absolutely no choice: you must stay in...... alone.
At most, single nights in alone are alright, however many of us will bounce from one ‘I am so fine’ state, to ‘should I just buy a cat and settle down?’. These weak moments where you begin to question your future are par for the course however there are some seriously big pitfalls that you might want to avoid in order to lighten your mood. Number one on this list are films and most notably, sad films. The chances are that you will be putting on a film and before you know it, boom - the tears are flowing. Thankfully, we’re here to save your bacon and have co-ordinated a top list of 5 films that you should avoid after a break up.
The Impossible
We understand that this film has a happy ending but it even made me cry, and I hadn’t even broken up with anyone! Honestly, this film is enough to reduce Vin Desel to tears - or at least that’s the story I’m sticking too - so if at all possible, we urge you to avoid until funner times are upon you.
P.S. I Love You
Don’t be fooled. This isn’t a story about simple love letters. This is a story about how a woman’s husband died and sends letters from the grave. We’re giving it a 8 out of 10 for watchability however it scores a 1 out of 10 for mood boosting.
Blue Valentine
This film flashbacks a couple falling in love over time, but most disturbingly the moral of the story is that nothing is perfect and still might not work out. This is not what you should be aiming to watch. Never having a happy ending might push you over the edge. A new cat could be closer than you think after watching this.
Titanic
For obvious reasons, especially the death part, this is not one to watch to cheer yourself up. This film has it all too: break-ups, death, old people dying together because they love each other, steamy sex (which is pretty painful to watch if you’re not getting any) and the giving of your own life to save another. I’m crying just thinking about it - the sex part that is.
The Break Up
Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston are great in this film but you’re playing with fire breaking up with someone only to watch a film based on that very subject. This could really go either way. You might find greater meaning in the film, or you could slip deeper into despair realizing that there is no hope for mankind from the curse of breaking up and that it’s all inevitable and every relationship from now on in is doomed and that must be why cat’s must be the cleverer race because thats why they stay single for all of their lives. Arrgh.
Well, we hope that you have managed to avoid emotional disaster the next time that you’re home alone after a break- up. Please remember that there is always music to cheer you up after a break-up. Just not sad ones though.
